Control the pace by summarising routine moments in a sentence and slowing down the key moment with detail. The reader should linger where the story turns.
This lesson is in extended writing. A good story also needs a plan, so see turning bullet points into a coherent plan for keeping events in order.
How do you slow down and speed up?
Speed up: cover routine time in one sentence, with no small detail. Slow down: split the key event into short beats: what the character sees, hears, feels and does.
Worked example: the missed bus
This is an original story idea. Amir is running late for his trial exam.
Rushed version. “Amir woke up late and ran to the bus stop, but the bus left. He was very worried, so he ran after it and got on. He reached school and sat for the exam.”
The key moment, the bus leaving, gets one sentence. The story rushes, and the reader feels nothing.
Paced version. “Amir woke ten minutes late, dressed in the dark and ran. At the bus stop, he saw the bus already pulling away. The brake lights glowed red.
He shouted, but the engine drowned his voice. His bag thumped against his back and his lungs burned as he chased it down the road. The door hissed open. The driver shook his head, but let him climb aboard.”
Waking up, the routine part, takes one short sentence. The chase, the key moment, runs over several sentences with sounds, body detail and a small twist at the end.
The mistake: equal speed everywhere
A student gives breakfast and the chase the same amount of detail. The story is long, and the important part gets lost.
| Moment | Rushed | Paced |
|---|---|---|
| Waking up | Some detail | One-line summary |
| The chase | One sentence | Several beats |
| The exam | Long detail | Short ending |
Mark your draft in two colours: one for lines that could be shorter, one for lines that need more detail. Then edit.
Check yourself
Rewrite this sentence so that it slows down: “The lights went out, and Nisha was scared.”
Answer
One possible answer: “The lights flickered once, then went out. The classroom hummed and stopped. Nisha’s hand reached for the desk edge, and she held her breath. Somewhere behind her, a chair scraped.”
It breaks one moment into four beats and shows fear through action and sound, without using the word “scared”.
What to study next
Move on to comparing writing genres before choosing a task, then test yourself with the extended writing practice set.
Use the English writing task checklist on your draft. For a teacher to read your stories with you, see online one-to-one English tuition.