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Scriptwriting · SPM subjects and learning resources

Revising dialogue: character intention and exposition

Your characters talk, but they sound like they are reading out the plot.

Good dialogue gives each line a purpose for the speaker. Exposition tells the audience something, while intention makes the speaker try to change the listener. The best lines do both together.

This lesson is part of SPM subjects and learning resources. It follows developing conflict and progression in a short scene.

How do you tell the difference?

For each line, ask: what does the speaker want the listener to do or feel? If the only answer is “to let the audience know”, the line is exposition without intention.

Mark the two kinds of line with different letters, then look at the balance.

Worked example: an invented bus-stop scene

Draft one. Mei and her brother Daniel wait for a bus after school.

MEI: Daniel, as you know, our mother is working late tonight because the clinic is short of staff.

DANIEL: Yes, and that is why we are taking the bus, because Father has the car at the workshop.

MEI: Since I am your older sister, I will make dinner.

Every line tells the audience a fact that both characters already know. Nobody wants anything from the other.

Finding the intention

Give each character a want. Mei wants Daniel to stop complaining and help with dinner. Daniel wants to go to his friend’s house instead.

Line Intention Information carried
Mei: “Mum’s late again. You’re on rice tonight.” Give Daniel a job Mother is working late
Daniel: “I told Faiz I’d come round.” Get out of the job He has other plans
Mei: “Faiz can wait. The bus takes forty minutes and Dad has the car.” Shut down his excuse No car, long journey

The facts have not vanished. They are now carried by lines where one character is pushing and the other is pushing back.

Why the revision works

In the revision, the audience learns about the mother, the car and the bus because they matter to the argument. No line is there only to brief the audience.

Readers can also hear two different voices. Mei is short and bossy, Daniel offers reasons, and both sound like siblings.

The mistake to avoid

The common slip is “as you know” dialogue, in which a character tells another what both already know. A quick test is to ask whether the listener could reply “I know”.

Fix it by asking what the speaker wants from the listener and rewriting the line as an attempt to get it.

Check yourself

Revise this line so it carries intention: “As you know, Dad’s shop closes at nine, and that is why I must collect the keys from him now.” Write a version where the speaker wants something.

Answer

One version: “Dad’s shop shuts at nine. Give me the keys now, or we are locked out.”

The speaker now wants the keys, and the closing time becomes pressure. The fact is kept, but it is used to get something from the listener.

What to study next

Read your revised dialogue aloud and check it with the structured-answer self-review tool. For a teacher to go through your lines with you, see online one-to-one Scriptwriting tuition.

Common questions

What is exposition in dialogue?

Exposition is background information given to the audience, such as who people are and what happened before. It becomes awkward when characters tell each other what both already know.

What is character intention in a line?

It is what the speaker is trying to make the listener do, feel or believe. A line with intention pushes against the other character.

Can I never use exposition?

You can. Place it where a character has a reason to say it, and mix it with what they want. Information should come out under pressure.

Can a teacher help with this online?

A teacher can read your dialogue with you and discuss each line. Your school sets any assessed requirements.

If your dialogue explains more than it lives, online one-to-one Scriptwriting lessons let a teacher read it aloud with you and mark where a character is only informing the audience.

  • Online one-to-one lessons for your child with an experienced teacher.
  • Your first class is a one-hour trial, from RM50. The fee is agreed before you book.
  • Happy with the teacher? Continue with lessons of about 1.5 hours. If not, ask for another teacher.